I would not accept that I was deaf. The signs were there but I ignored them. Like the woodwork class when I was seeking a piece of wood in the cupboard and didn’t hear the teacher telling the class to gather round him. To get my attention he hurled wood. It worked. Fortunately it didn’t hit me. The rest of the class thought it was hilarious.

I didn’t like the record player that developed a fault, and music played on it became distorted. Only the fault was not with the record player but with my ears. I had reached a stage when I could no longer hear my beloved music, like Duke Ellington playing ‘Do nothing ‘til you hear from me’. My jazz collection began to gather dust.

When I finally had to admit that I needed a hearing aid, it was a long time before I actually used it.
Of course, worsening hearing meant the need for a more powerful hearing aid and then two. I was fighting a losing battle.

After a lifetime of struggling with my deafness my consultant finally referred me for consideration for a cochlear implant. I was thrilled when funding was approved and I was accepted to have the operation at Queen Elizabeth Hospital, Birmingham, in September 1995. From then my hearing improved greatly and it became possible to talk to my family on the telephone. A great joy for us all!

Today I still find group conversation and noisy parties difficult. One-to-one communication is still necessary even with my lifesaving cochlear implant. But it’s getting better! I’m smiling more at bank staff and have even been able to give directions to those that are lost. Were they the correct directions? Now that’s another matter.

But please don’t get me wrong – I certainly do not blame everything on my hearing loss. I am by nature non-decisive and don’t face up to problems. Perhaps I would have been more decisive without hearing loss… but then again, perhaps not! Certainly being deaf did not help, but I know that many have tackled and overcome hearing problems far greater than mine. I do admire them.

Tony Gill